Blog Archives

[Freeware, Remake] The Abbey of Crime Extensum

Get your Sean Connery on. No, no, not with a pistol and martini of the shaken variety, but with sandals and robes. Wait, bear with me… The Abbey of Crime Extensum may be about abstinent monks, but it also happens to be a pretty darn polished and challenging The Name of the Rose murder mystery. So it may not have secret agent action, but it does contain a license to kill.

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Playing as Franciscan monk Fray William and his young novice Adso of Melk (yes, you sort of have to control both at once), you are thrust into a race against time to find the perpetrator of a series of grisly murders in a Benedictine abbey.

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New Retro News: Return to Stair City 2

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Time for a quick update on some new retro happenings. This week’s them is: terrible controls don’t die, they just fade away. Also, basketball.

  • Double Dragon returns, again!
  • More masochism – stair quest ascends!
  • Boom-shaka-laka! NBA JAM updated!

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Murder Mansion

Capcom may be taking its latest zombie-or-hillbilly fest back to its survival horror roots, but Murder Mansion takes the same concept back to its roots in a much more literal way – placing a Jill Valentine lookalike in an eerily familiar looking mansion full of undead creatures waiting around for you to shoot the crap out of them.

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It’s more of a homage than actual survival horror, with its easy to disaptch enemies and tongue-in-cheek humour making it more fun than scary. It also has a little, unexpected surprise…

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Depth of Extinction

Spend some quality time with underwater mercenaries and those giant sharks from Deep Blue Sea: Welcome to Depth of Extinction. A tactical 2D XCOM wannabe of sorts,

A tactical 2D XCOM wannabe of sorts, Depth replaces everyone’s favourite psychic murderous aliens with emotionless killer robots. It’s about as barebones as a roast turkey after thanksgiving, or a piece of otherwise inedible KFC after a drunken night out, but like said example foodstuffs, Depth is equally as strangely compelling.

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I spent far too many hours having “just one more go”: a fully fleshed and well-stuffed Depth of Extinction is a game I’d happily chow down on.

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[New Retro Vault] Sky Rogue

Sky Rogue harks back to the low poly games of an earlier era, such as Virtua Racing and Air/Ace Combat for the PSX. I mention Virtua Racing though specifically, because much like that game, Sky Rogue carries with it a distinctly arcade feel. It’s bright, colourful, action-packed and, yes, it’s challenging.

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[New Retro Vault] Donkey Me

When it comes to retro games, we spend a lot of time panning classic movie licensed games (and with good reason – they were almost universally terrible). However, it’s about time we dig up something more positive – so allow me to present Donkey Me: a collection of movie themes applied to the classic Donkey Kong arcade format.

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Featuring 10 “skins” to choose from, there’s pretty much something for everyone here, whether it’s Raiders of the Lost Ark, Star Wars, Rambo, or my personal favourite, Gremlins.

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Gunmetal Arcadia Zero

I haven’t seen a single metal gun, nor video game arcade made out of gunmetal, but that hasn’t stopped me enjoying Gunmetal Arcadia Zero ‘til the end. An arcade adventure with an obscenely customizable CRT filter, Arcadia Zero isn’t perhaps as deep as its RPG/metroidvania elements would imply, but it’s worth a visit.

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Butcher (demo)

(like) Mad Max had managed to get himself out of the desert and into a macabre industrial plant; but you’re no savior. You will be the judge, jury and executioner as you Khmer Rouge the last remains of humanity.

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If you want a vision of Butcher, imagine a cyborg stamping on a human face for 20 levels. You may be a barely discernible slab of pixels, but there’s no meatbag you can’t tear limb from limb.

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Super Knight World

Acknowledgements have been made. Gates have been opened. New Retro Games now has press access on the growing games portal Itch.io. What this means is that we are able to review gosh dang commercial games!

…which puts us in a conundrum, as when we generously receive a free game, I feel an obligation to write about it. Even if I must announce that it’s not a good game.

Super Knight World is not a good game.

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But there’s a certain utility in writing about games that lack praise – there may be people who want to know if it’s worth their hard-earned money. Read on to see if you think Super Knight World is worth the paltry $0.99 it’s asking for ($2.99 with level editor).

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Archaea Terata

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a lone man in possession of a good arsenal, must be in want to murder an endless stream of arachnids. So goes the old saying, and so the saying goes

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Shawn Beck understands the importance of such prose, and created a computer entertainment system experience known as a ‘game’ to demonstrate this understanding through the joy of being eaten by dozens of giant spiders.

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